It’s here. Well, my due date was later in November, but since my last two came 3 weeks early, I consider that the due date is here. What we need to remember is that people were there for us during our loss. They were there to hold our hand, wipe our tears, give us a hug, and to pray for our peace. They were there.
That is sometimes forgotten when the due date comes and no one seems to remember. Or, if they do remember, they don’t know what to say – so usually say nothing at all.
Here is an example:
A group of girls went out to dinner recently, and one of our friends is due in January. She looks AMAZING! Plus, she is literally one of the sweetest people I know.
The next night, I was talking with my husband, sharing how the dinner was the night before. When I told him our neighbor was there he asked:
Do you want to talk about it? I’m not sure I want to, but if you do, I will. Just know I know. I just don’t know what to say.
So, if he doesn’t know what to say – just think of everyone else. Even if they remember, what is there to say?
Here is why that is important… WE NEED TO TELL PEOPLE WHAT WE NEED!
I say that because, when we are struggling, others – even our spouses – don’t always know and don’t always know what to say. And, when we are struggling, we may not recognize that others around us who were effected – like our spouses – may be struggling, too. They might be looking for us to take the lead on the conversation.
And, I don’t know about anyone else, but for me, I don’t know what to say, either. I just know that it hurts. And, I think this one hurts a little more because it is final. It was my last.
Here is what I am hoping I can continue to focus on:
- When I didn’t think I could EVER have children, God proved to me that He is in control of that
- We conceived naturally FIVE TIMES!
- We had THREE SUCCESSFUL PREGNANCIES – carrying each to term (or close)
- We have THREE AMAZING CHILDREN on Earth & two in Heaven
- Maybe our first little one needed a sibling to play with 🙂
You want to know what else…
Without that last loss, I wouldn’t have started this blog. I wouldn’t have been able to get my thoughts out that I was STUFFING for years! I wouldn’t have gotten into my Bible and really starting holding up my end of this relationship with God. And, I don’t know that I would have appreciated all that I have.
We have been blessed! Truly blessed! And, it’s okay to be sad. I just don’t want my sadness to overshadow all of the goodness that God has blessed us with.
Just like the poem “Footprints in the Sand,” I really need You to hold me right now. Help hold me up when I can no longer stand. Help me to see all the AMAZING blessings You have provided and allow me to have peace with that.
God, You are Great! You are Faithful! You are GOD!
Thank You for all You have provided. Thank You for all of Your blessings. And, thank You for bringing goodness even out of the toughest situations.