I have often wondered about God’s “Peace beyond Understanding.” There have been times where I thought I had felt that in my life, but I must admit, I have never felt it like I feel it now.
For the last several months, I haven’t been feeling quite right. I knew there was something going on in my body that wasn’t right, but I couldn’t figure it out. I have been to several doctors with no answers…until this past Friday.
Before I get to my answer, here is a little history. We are parents of three amazing children on Earth and two in Heaven. The last child we lost was tough on both my husband and I, and we just knew that God was helping us to know that we weren’t to have any more children.
A couple of months ago, I learned that I had already started into menopause (yes, at 37 – CRAZY). So, that closed the door on more children and helped us to focus on the three amazing little babies we have already been blessed with on Earth. We will see our other two when we get to the other side :).
So, I went in for another procedure early last week, got a call on Thursday to come into the doctor the next day, and on Friday I received this news:
They found cancer.
They believe they caught it early, but it’s aggressive.
I need to meet with an oncologist to talk about my options – best option right now is a full hysterectomy.
If that happens, I should be cured…
The strange thing is, that Thursday night, I told my husband that is what was going to happen. It was almost as if God was whispering it to me in my ear. Calming me to let me know that “He’s got this” before I even walked through the doors. Helping me to prepare myself and my husband for the news that we inevitably received just 12 hours later.
Philippians 4:6-7 (GNB): Don’t worry about anything, but in all your prayers ask God for what you need, always asking Him with a thankful heart. And God’s peace, which is far beyond human understanding, will keep your hearts and minds safe in union with Christ Jesus.
When we left the office, my husband said – “so, I guess that is good news, right?” God had helped me to prepare him so well, that he was already in a positive space. He was focused on “caught early” “already have three amazing children” “hysterectomy should cure it.” I must admit, I wasn’t there quite so quickly, but I did get there.
Here is what I know for sure – God has this! He knew it was going to happen before I did. He already knows the results. And, He will see us through this.
I come to You today with thanks. Thank You for preparing us for the news we received last week. Thank You for Your Peace beyond Understanding. We know that You have this covered. You prepared us for the news. You guided the doctor’s hand to find what she needed to find. And, You will be with the doctor this Friday to make the best decisions with the best outcomes. And, if there is more to find, I ask you guide the doctor’s hands to find anything else there so we can treat it early.
Lord, I do ask that You help me keep this with You. When I put this back on my shoulders, I ask that You help me to give it back to You. I know You are not asking me to do this on my own. I am not strong enough to handle this. However, (Philippians 4:13), I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me. I know You are with me, with us and with our providers. Thank you.
In Jesus’ Name,